No matter what other problems present themselves in therapy, a lack of bonding through personal rituals, will inevitably cause tension and insecurity in the relationship.
What constitutes a ritual?
It can be something very simple such as dinner out together every Friday night or celebrating your anniversaries at the same place you first met. A kiss goodbye in the morning, a coffee and a debrief together in the evening, are all rituals too.
Why are rituals important?
They are an essential part of a loving and caring relationship. They help to make your partner feel special and make the relationship more vibrant and strong because you have spent the time and energy to perform them.
Examples of rituals you can implement into your relationship:
- Kiss goodbye and hello
- Regular date nights
- Notes of love in unexpected places
- Taking time to chat on a regular basis
- Sharing hobbies or interests
- Holding hands when you watch TV together
- Candlelit dinner once a month
- Celebrating anniversaries of important milestones in your relationship
- Saying “I Love you” in a special way that belongs to just the two of you
- Never letting the sun go down on your anger
- Etc etc
There are no rules about rituals, but try them and see the difference it makes to you and your partner, by showing each other that choosing to have them in your life was the best decision you ever made.