couple in bed, back to back

When the ‘Passion’ has died

There are many reasons for a relationship breakup; infidelity, financial pressure and poor communication are only some of them.

However, boredom can be one of the biggest causes.

During the honeymoon phase, couples are still learning about each other and it’s an exhilarating period of growth and change. Both partners are constantly surprising each other and their lives are full of passion and excitement. Once this part of the relationship is over, one or both partners may feel that the relationship is just standing still, no longer going anywhere. This is the time that boredom may set in. For others, this stage offers the security and comfort needed for the long haul.

Some studies indicate that passion and romantic love have a natural expiry date after which a companionable love settles in but others believe that passion is possible in a long term relationship. Some couples will chose to separate when the companionate love begins, saying ‘there’s no passion anymore’. Others will talk about the possibility of an open relationship, move into a more platonic relationship or simply cheat.

So how do you maintain that passion and romantic love beyond the honeymoon phase? There is no single easy answer to this question but couples who treat each other with respect, build up solid rituals in their shared lives and go out of their way to consistently add new adventures and stimulation to their relationship, will have a far greater chance of keeping the romance and passion alive. This is not just about sex, but maintenance and evolution of common interests. Couples who regularly learn new things together, have romantic weekends away and grow together, will maintain love and passion even if it’s not as red hot as the honeymoon phase!

Passion may be replaced with companionship and security but relationships don’t have to become boring.  As Fredrich Nietzsche said: “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” 

Carole does not take sides and her ability to provide perspective based on her wealth of experience was very helpful.

The exercises were very practical and really helped us to understand where we fail to communicate effectively or assume too much.

The conflict resolution list is very useful and anyone who masters this will experience a lot more peace in their relationship.

Thank you Carole.
a single red rose
from Fiji
It is early in the process but we both have optimism about our future together and our progress so far has been substantial.

Thanks Carole.
from Vic.
We are going real well, probably better than we ever expected.

I personally thank you for making such a difference to my life and I know (S) feels the same.
from QLD
Your workshop was great for us and was what we needed to make a fresh start and turn our relationship around.

We'd recommend your workshop to any couple who are in trouble and want to rekindle their love!

Thanks again Carole
J & M
from NSW
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couple lying back to back in bed
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